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4islove

The class blog of 4I'07 Dunman High School

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3[I]chiban 06
4islove 07
Past Gang Head: Chng Jia Hui
Current Gang Head: Celine Chee (No retirement for you!)
Outstanding achievement: We are a class!

Saturday, February 25, 2006

12:39 AM

This is an actual job application a 17 year old boy submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment in Florida...and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!

Note: Name changed to proctect individual

NAME: Lee Yuan Ming

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with the fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde George who thinks I'm the greatest thing since George. As well as get to bow to the great, charming, witty, smart, wise, seh, strong, good, (So on and so forth) cHunKy. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.

SIGN HERE: Aries.

Hope its understandable, or else its impossible to do job applications for people who can't.

I'm feeling so weird today, dunno why. Must be my tired spirits. Who cares.

I have an apple, and you have two.
You gimme 1 apple, so I have 2.
I eat 1 apple and give 1 back to you.
Now I have no apple, and you have 2.

A nice song with no meaning done by Yong Chiang's Junior.

Mmm what else??

Im feeling so sianz. Play Warcraft til sian liao.

Yong Chiang is the only person I know who can forget to sleep. I can only forget to wake up.

Pb 2+ ions gains 2 electrons to form Pb atoms. - My senior.

Since its a post, might as well make it longer.

Which question do you not expect a response at all???
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THINK harder
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Answer: The above question.

Like I said, im feeling weird. Should be long enough for more complaints. Great cHunKy out-